What does it take to 'write'?

To me, 'writing' is a conversation with you. You are an infinitely patient and positively criticizing listener.

Before publishing any of my sentences to the world, I discuss it with you as long as it takes for it to reach a level of clarity and impact. Writing, many a times, turns out to be a process of crystallization of vague thoughts into a clear structure. And I like it that way. I loose the joy of writing if I wait till the crystallization is complete in thought. And we share the innate joy of watching an idea crystallizing into a sentence.

I like to be with you only when we have a room all for ourselves and I don't have any imminent deadlines to meet. I never take you along when I go out for work or to party. I don't tell you good bye when I leave and never tell you when I'll be back. I never call you when I'm out, or answer your calls. But you don't complain.

In fact you never complain. That's according to me your worst habit and that's the reason I love you most and that's the reason I write so less, and thats the reason I enjoy writing the most.

I know that you are nothing but a ghost of my own creation. But I can never believe so. At least, not when I'm writing.

Fish Pond

I joined as lecturer in NIT Calicut yesterday. Inside the administrative block , on the ground floor, there are two small fish ponds. Some big gold fish were swimming in one of them in company of an angel and a turtle. I was waiting there for some reason and my mindless eyes were on those gold fish for a long time. When my mind joined the eyes, it started a conversation with them.

Fish (to me): Which direction should we be swimming?

My mind (to me): Ahh, It's that same old Alice in Wonderland question

'Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?'
'That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,'
'I don't know where. . .'
'Then it doesn't matter which way you go,'

My mind (to me): Ohh, let me not be so philosophical. Let me try, if I can help those fishes. Think. Think.

think ...
think ...

My mind (to the fish): It doesn't matter which way you swim. What matters is that you have to swim.

[Post Script]

We are just two lost souls, swimming in a fish bowl, year after year.
Running over the same old ground. What have we found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here.

~ Roger Waters, David Gilmore, "Wish You Were Here" c. 1975 Pink Floyd Music Publishers Ltd.

സുഖമോ ദേവി

"സ്വപ്നത്തില്‍ നിന്നും യാഥാര്ത്യ്‌ ത്തിലേക്കുള യാത്രയില്‍ പരമാവതി പൊട്ടിച്ചിരിക്കാന്‍ ശ്രമിക്കുക. ആ പൊട്ടിചിരിയാണു ജീവിതം എന്ന റിയാലിറ്റി. ചെറുപ്പം ചെറുപ്പകാലത്തു തന്നെ കളിച്ചു തീര്ത്ത കലാകാരന്മാരായ എന്റെ രണ്ടു സുഹ്രുത്തുക്കള്‍. കുഞ്ജുവിളയും സൈമണ്‍ മാത്യുവും. ഇവരുടെ ഓര്മയ്ക്കു മുന്നില്‍ ഒരു നല്ല സിനിമ എന്ന എന്റെ ആഗ്രഹം ഞാന്‍ സമര്പ്പിക്കുകയാണു. നിങ്ങള്‍ വളര്ത്തിയെടുത്ത, നിങ്ങളുടെ വേണു നാഗവള്ളി."

ഈ സിനിമ ഞാന്‍ ഇന്നു ഒന്നുകൂടി കണ്ടു.

ഇത്തവണ, ഇതിലെ സണ്ണി എന്ന സൈമണ്‍ മാത്ത്യു എന്റെ അടുത്ത സുഹ്രുത്തായ പ്രിയന്റെ ചിറ്റപ്പനാണു എന്ന തിരിച്ചറിവോടു കൂടി.